Of all the stupid television that the 1970s brought us, The Gong Show might take the cake. For those thankfully unfamiliar, the show revolved around a competition, where various yahoos would parade their "talents", be it singing, dancing, hopping on one foot, or...

WHOOOOOOOONG!

If the judges didn't like the performance, they would whack the eponymous gong, resonating the studio with loud ringing that would stop the contestant in their tracks. A tuxedo-clad midget was involved. Yes, it was absurdly bizarre.

The Gong Show was hosted by Chuck Barris, who was also responsible for that 1960s staple, The Dating Game. With his tidy Jewfro, Barris presided over the absurdity... while moonlighting as a CIA assassin on the side.

Or so he claimed, at least, writing an autobiography, Confessions of a Dangerous Mind, that was later made into a movie. Now, according to the CIA, Barris' claim is complete and utter bullshit, but, think about it, why would the CIA ever admit to hiring the host of one of the stupidest TV shows in history as an assassin...

WHOOOOOOOONG!