You know who sucks? Shakespeare. There, we said it. What are you gonna do about it?

Oh sure, he is only considered the greatest writer ever. But have you ever actually read his stuff? If you did, it probably was in high school English. Do you remember actually enjoying it? Of course you don't. You slogged through it. Or opted for CliffsNotes.

We shouldn't be so tough, you're saying? Shakespeare gave us some of the greatest stories of all time? Sure he did. Except most (all?) of his stories are not exactly original; the plots are taken from elsewhere. And what about the transcendent characters, you say? Hamlet and Lear, Othello and Shylock!

Don't get us started about Shylock.

OK, you got us started about Shylock. Shylock!

Shylock is terrible. He is antisemitic stereotyping at its worst. His portrayal did no good for Europe's Jews; in fact, it helped contribute to antisemitic tides. His name became a synonym for greed. And at the end of the play, he is forced to convert to Christianity. How is that for a happy ending! Tragic comedy our foot!

Stupid, sucky Shakespeare...