Birthers of America!

We have some horrible news. You better sit down for this.

The leader of your movement, Orly Taitz, is not exactly American. Oh, really. Don't believe us? It's right here, in her birth certificate. Born in Kishinev, Moldovan SSR, Union of Soviet Socialist Republics. Not only is she not American or Christian, she is a COMMUNIST. Read it and weep.

What's this, you are saying? Orly became a naturalized citizen? Oh, really? How exactly are you going to prove that? With her naturalization certificate? We hope it's a real one, and not just a copy!

And even if it was real, do you know they give these out to just about anyone? All you need to do is answer some grade school questions, and you are supposedly an American, just like that! Even if you are really a Soviet-born COMMUNIST! Oh, really!

Sorry, birthers. We're going to have to report Orly so she gets deported back to her real country where she can be among her fellow COMMUNISTS. America for Americans, right?

Really?