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    Henny Youngman

    Jew Score:



    March 16, 1906 – February 24, 1998

    There comes a time in every Jewish boy's life that he steps up to the Torah and becomes a man. In front of loving eyes of family and friends, he reads a passage... and then tries to crack a few awful jokes. But that's alright, he doesn't know better. He's 13.

    Henny Youngman should have known better. He was 73.

    Why did Youngman's joke-filled bar mitzvah come 60 years too late? Apparently, on the day it was originally scheduled, a cousin died, so it was canceled. Instead of officially becoming a man, Youngman embarked of usually-funny one-liners. "I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.", "Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.", and the most famous one, "Take my wife... Please!".

    Oh, Youngman was rather popular for a while, but as his relevance waned, he just couldn't let it go. Later in his life, he would wander through hotels and banquet halls, pimping out himself for a few hundred bucks. Hey, do you want a once-famous comedian at your wedding? Take him... Please!

    See what can happen if you miss the financial windfall of your bar mitzvah?

    Verdict: Jew.

    July 2, 2013

    See Also

    Milton Berle

    David Freedman

    Buddy Hackett

    Jack E. Leonard

    The Three Stooges
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