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    Maurice de Hirsch

    Jew Score:



    December 9, 1831 – April 21, 1896

    After a sleepless night spent on bumpy, windy roads, Leibowitz was dropped off in front of a large field. The coachman sped away, leaving Leibowitz to stare into acres of nothingness. He sighed and started walking.

    After what must have been at least five miles, his pants covered in layers of dirt and dust, Leibowitz finally saw a sign of life. A man on horseback was driving a heard of cattle. Leibowitz let out a loud yell, then collapsed to the ground.

    The man turned around, stared into the distance, spurred his horse, and galloped towards Leibowitz. He jumped off and stood over the fallen man. Drops of sweat dripped off his chin and onto Leibowitz.

    "Stein... is that you?", Leibowitz whispered.

    The man removed a flask from his belt and poured the contents into Leibowitz's throat. Leibowitz gulped it down feverishly.

    The man standing over Leibowitz looked like a typical gaucho. A wide-brimmed hat covered his forehead, a hefty mustache adorned his face. His chaps covered his long boots. His eyes... his eyes were Stein's.

    "What are you doing here?", Stein asked.

    "I've come for you!", answered Leibowitz. "I've come to take you back!"


    "What do you mean, why? Look at... this! This horse, these cows, these boots, this hat! This is not you, Stein, this is not you!"

    "It is me, Leibowitz."

    "This life..."

    "This life is my life now, Leibowitz."

    "But... you are a learned man! You don't belong here!"

    "Where do I belong, Leibowitz? There? In the old world? They don't want us there, Leibowitz!"

    "It will change! You will see!"

    "Will it? I'm tired of waiting for it to change, Leibowitz. Thankfully, Baron de Hirsch was tired as well. He got us out, Leibowitz! Argentina? Why not Argentina? It beats the alternative!"


    "Actually, cow shit, Leibowitz," quipped Stein, pointing to the other man's shoes.

    Liebowitz took a look at his feet, and wretched.

    "Come on," said Stein, effortlessly hopping on his horse. "Get on behind me, we'll get you cleaned up. Mrs. Stein is getting Shabbat dinner ready..."


    "Just because we're half the world away, doesn't mean we have to forget old traditions..."

    "Mrs. Stein?"

    "Come, Leibowitz. I'll fill you in on the way."

    Verdict: Jew.

    September 17, 2013

    See Also

    Theodor Herzl

    Semei Kakungulu

    Javier Milei

    Mountain Jews

    Isaac Steinberg
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