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    Yakov Blumkin

    Jew Score:
    10

    I5

    O3

    K2
    1898(?) – November 3, 1929

    Yakov Blumkin lived all of 31 years (or perhaps all of 29; his birthdate is not clear), but he sure got a lot done in that time:

  • Worked as an electrician and in the theater
  • Took part in Jewish self-defense against pogroms
  • Raided banks
  • Joined the Leftist Socialists
  • Assassinated German diplomat, Wilhelm von Mirbach
  • Was captured by Ukrainian nationalists
  • Had his teeth broken
  • For killing Mirbach, was sentenced to death
  • Sold out his leftist friends
  • Had his sentence revoked
  • Became friends with Trotsky
  • Became Trotsky's bodyguard
  • Helped overthrow the government in a region of Persia
  • Was shot six times
  • Stopped anti-Soviet peasant uprisings
  • Spied in Estonia under the guise of a jeweler
  • Became the Soviet resident in Palestine
  • Stopped an anti-Soviet uprising in Georgia
  • In Afghanistan, tried to prop up a guru as a god
  • Became friends with some of Russia's most famous poets
  • In the guise of a Buddhist monk, joined an expedition with the goal of assassinating the Dalai Lama (Probably not true, but we wouldn't put that past him)
  • Was sent to Mongolia to help lead the new Communist state
  • Became the Soviet resident in Constantinople
  • Spied under the guise of a pious Jewish laundromat owner
  • Exported Jewish manuscripts into Palestine
  • Tried to assassinate Stalin's escaped secretary
  • Was sold out by his girlfriend for supporting Trotsky
  • Was killed by firing squad

    We left a bunch of stuff out...

    Verdict: Jew.

    March 24, 2017

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