Right now, you, the readers of this profile, are split into two camps. One is saying, "They finally profiled Andre Gide!", while the other is asking, "Why are they profiling Andre Gide?". Well, there is a third, perhaps most voluminous camp, that is confused: "Who the hell is Andre Gide?"

For shame, third camp! Gide was a titan of the pen, a literary giant, a Nobel laureate, friend of Oscar Wilde, perhaps France's most accomplished writer of the 20th century. (He also led a rather... ahem... unorthodox sex live that we would rather not delve into.)

So, why are we finally profiling Gide? Well, you wouldn't ask that question if you spoke a certain language. No, not French, but rather one of a number of Eastern European languages, where Gide's name sounds like...

Alright, fine, we'll say it; in Russian, Andre Gide's name is "Andre Kike".

Ugh. That being said...