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    Anna Boden

    Jew Score:



    September 20, 1976 —

    The ten-year-old can't wait for the end of Infinity War, so he was more than excited to see Marvel's newest hero, Captain (err...) Marvel, in an eponymous new movie. After all, Captain Marvel is supposed to play a huge role in defeating that nihilistic purple asshole Thanos. So we went to see it opening weekend. And then, a strange thing happened.

    The ten-year-old fell asleep.

    Yes, the same ten-year-old who has lapped up every Marvel offering for the last half-decade, fell asleep somewhere in the second act. "It's so boring," he said, after we woke him up. "How much longer?"

    We stayed for the whole thing, and he actually got excited during the final act, so it all ended well. Yet come to think of it, the ten-year-old had a point. Sandwiched between a good beginning and a terrific end is an hour of slog, with only 90s jokes to break the monotony. (Shout-out to our favorite search engine of yesteryear! The ten-year-old didn't get it.)

    So, who is to blame? Probably the directing team of Anna Boden (Jew) and Ryan Fleck (goy), in their first venture to the Marvel Universe. But heck, who are we to criticize? Their movie is smashing box offices around the country and is getting rave reviews as well.

    That being said, the ten-year-old fell asleep!

    Verdict: Jew.

    March 15, 2019

    See Also

    Jon Favreau

    Jude Law

    Ben Mendelsohn

    Taika Waititi
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