Ah, the sick day — a tradition as American as bbqs, baseball and bombings. We took one a little while ago and we're still reveling in the post-daytime-TV glow.

Here's our advice. Spend the morning surfing the web (save some extra time for your JONJ habit), but once 11 hits drop right onto the couch for the Price is Right (Drew Carey: Not a Jew). After that, your time is your own till 5:30 when Pardon the Interruption comes on followed by Simpsons, Seinfeld, Jeopardy and Family Guy (early evening lineup is approximate. Actual TV lineup may vary). Now that is an afternoon well spent!

The problem is what to watch in between Carey and Kornheiser. Sometimes you can find a good movie or a House marathon (bonus points for taking a day in summer when you can usually find afternoon baseball). But chances are, around 4:30 you're gonna run out of steam and that's where things get dangerous, because you might decide to flip to ESPN early and crash right into Jim Rome.

Oh, sure he's been around for a while, gets good guests, whatever. And despite the name he actually is 100% Jew. But that doesn't make him any less insufferable as he climbs up on his giant soapbox every afternoon to preen his face pubes while doing his little "holier than thou" dance all over the TV.

No, at that point you're better off just switching off the TV and staring at the wall. Especially since if you somehow make it through Rome it gets worse: Around the Horn is next and that show has killed more people than the videotape in The Ring.