If we had the opportunity to add to our roster of Jews one of the winningest coaches in NFL history, would we take it?

On the first look, we would gladly welcome Marty Schottenheimer. He has turned around multiple franchises and is one of only six coaches to win 200 regular season games.

But the key phrase is "regular season". When the games start to really matter, Schottenheimer falls flat on his face. None of his teams have reached the Super Bowl. In fact, the last four times he made the playoffs, his teams were huge favorites — and failed to win a single game.

Of course, it's all academic since Schottenheimer is not Jewish but German (for the millionth time, dear readers: a long, tongue-twisting last name is not necessarily Jewish, no matter how many h's it has).

Whatever. We're just glad we'll never have to consider Jeff Fischer.