Who invented the first sandwich?

What kinda of question is that, says the astute reader. The Earl of Sandwich, of course! You're not gonna tell us that he is Jewish, are you?

No, dear reader. The deliciously-named Earl couldn't be farther away from a Jew. But it's his claim to the invention that we're having trouble with.

Passover is coming up, isn't it? And what are you eating, other than that oh-so-delightful combination of hard-boiled eggs and parsley?

Well, the Hillel Sandwich, of course! You place the horseradish between the matzoh and bite into the savory deliciousness!

Or not. Seriously, the Hillel Sandwich sucks. But it was created by Hillel the Elder, some 17 centuries before the Earl. So it's about time the true inventor got his due.

Hillel's other contributions?

The Mishnah. And the Talmud.

Bite into that, Earl.