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    L. L. Zamenhof

    Jew Score:



    (Ludwig Lazarus Zamenhof)
    December 15, 1859 – April 14, 1917

    Ancient Babylonia. The angels Gabriel and Raphael are looking down from the clouds.

    Raphael: Look at those stupid humans, building that stupid tower. Who do they think they are?

    Gabriel: I dunno, I kinda like it.

    Raphael: Like it? It's blasphemous! Look how tall it is! Almost reaching the sky!

    Gabriel: It can't reach the sky, it's not like the sky is solid or anything...

    Raphael: Well, they don't know that, do they?

    Gabriel: No, they don't. Dumb humans. In any case, I don't think He minds...

    Raphael: Oh, I'll make sure He minds!

    Gabriel: Don't you think there's already enough for Him to worry about? There is a new tyrant in Corinth. A famine in Australia...

    Raphael: What the hell is Australia?

    Gabriel: Besides, you remember what happened the last time you tried to bother Him?

    Raphael: Yes, He...

    Gabriel: He sent you down to live with the humans.

    Raphael: Worst month of my life. Although Beverly was nice.

    Gabriel: The Whore of Babylon?

    Raphael: She prefers the term concubine.

    Gabriel: How did you and the... concubine...

    Raphael: Never mind that! This time will be different! I'll make sure He puts an end to this!

    Later that day. Raphael flies over to Gabriel's cloud. Gabriel is nervously looking down.

    Gabriel: What's going on there?

    Raphael: Look at these petty little humans! Screaming at each other, and no one can understand a word!

    Gabriel: What did He do?

    Raphael: Scrambled their languages. Now every human can't understand what the other one is saying. Oh, the hilarity!

    Gabriel: Yes, its beyond hilarious.

    Raphael: Look, that one threw a brick at another! Soon, their whole tower will crumble!

    Gabriel: So I take it, this time He had the time for your complaints?

    Raphael: Yes, I lucked out. He just beat Satan in dominoes, so He was in good mood.

    Gabriel: But all these languages... How will humans ever learn to cooperate?

    Raphael: Since when do you care about humans so much? Besides, He said this isn't forever.

    Gabriel: No?

    Raphael: He says, in 2000 years, give or take, a Jew will try re-create the unifying language. Esperanto, he will call it.

    Gabriel: It's always a Jew, isn't it?

    Raphael: They are a smart bunch, I give you that. Bank on this, though, I'll make sure this Esperanto will not take.

    Gabriel: And how will you do that?

    Raphael: I have two millennia to figure it out! But now I have to say goodbye...

    Gabriel: He banished you again?

    Raphael: For a year this time. See you, chump. I'm coming, Beverly!

    Verdict: Jew.

    May 21, 2012

    See Also

    Sholom Aleichem

    Saul Alinsky

    The Devil

    Rosalind Franklin

    Ludwig Wittgenstein
    © Jew or Not Jew, 2006-2024.