As part of JONJ's continued dedication to our long history and the Jewish community, we occasionally reprint profiles from our historical archives. Today we present Corey Feldman, published in "Jew or Not Jew Annual '89!" written by former staff writer Leah Goldberg.

Like, I know what you're thinking and Oh! My! G-d! Yes, he's only like the cutest Corey ever and he's like totally Jewish!

Why didn't anyone tell me?!

Anyone who's seen him can tell he's totally super talented. He's done so many oh-so-great movies like Dream a Little Dream and License to Drive and I hear he's super-cute in Lost Boys, too, but I didn't see that one cause it's scary and I totally don't need that, y'know?

My friend Stacy says he's into drugs and just a fad, but, whatever, cause she's a total ho bag anyway. Corey is just too talented and cute to let drugs ruin his career. 19 years from now when he's winning like all these Academy Awards, I'll just drive by her house in my husband's flying Mercedes and tell her 'I told you so.' So HA!

If only his super cute friend Corey Haim were Jewish, too. Wait. He is!?

Oh! My! G-d!