You got us. We admit it.

We hate Christmas.

We hate everything about it: from the egg nog to Rudolph to "It's a Wonderful Life". And Christmas carols? Don't get us started on Christmas carols.

So if we ever became, oh, just to throw it out there, the governor of, let's say... Hawaii, the first thing we'd do (after declaring macaroons the state's official desert) is to ban Christmas. Just like that... poof. No more Santa. No more Nativity scenes. No more candy canes.

Sounds far-fetched? You bet. But it didn't stop Linda Lingle's opponents from claiming she would abolish Christmas as a state holiday if she won the gubernatorial election.

Well, Linda became Hawaii's first Jewish governor, and, as far as we know, Hawaiians still celebrate Christmas. Hmmmm. Maybe Ms. Lingle doesn't hate fruitcake and elves as much as we do.

You got off easy, Hawaiians.