Pssst! Goyim! We've got a secret for you!

Not all Jews keep Kosher!

Alright, it's not really a secret. But so many goyim assume that's the case. Gullible, gullible goyim...

Oh, sure, Orthodox Jews keep Kosher. Conservative too. And those guys in the black hats? The sole concept of shellfish makes their blood boil.

Not us! Oh, we love ourselves some lobster... Our mouth waters just thinking about it. Seriously, it's the 21st century. Kashrut Law might have made sense millennia ago, when certain food went bad quickly. We have refrigeration today! We don't need to obey arcane logic!

Which brings us to British Jewish celebrity chef Heston Blumenthal, whose most famous creation is the least Kosher thing ever imaginable: bacon-and-egg ice cream.

You know, no. No to bacon-and-egg ice cream. No, not because of Kashrut.

It just sounds incredibly nauseating.