August 21, 1974 —
Have you wondered what Amy Fisher, the so-called Long Island Lolita, has been up to ever since she shot the wife of her boyfriend (Buttafuoco! Buttafuoco! Buttafuoco!) in the face? Oh, we know you haven't, but since we have acquired this incredibly useless knowledge, we have no choice but to share it with you.
She spent seven years in jail.
She married a guy twice her age.
Her husband released a sex tape.
She fought the release of that sex tape.
She released an adult film.
She started a porn website.
Aren't you glad that you know all of that now! Would you like to learn more about Amy? No? Then feel free to skip over the next bullet.
She is half Jewish.
Sometimes it's better not knowing...
Verdict: Borderline Jew.
April 19, 2009