Face it: Jewish last names are hard to pronounce. Even the ones that seem easy on paper, often create a lot of confusion.

Take the newest recipient of the JONJ perfect score, famed conductor and composer Leonard Bernstein, for instance. What is the correct pronunciation? Is it "Burn"-"steen"? Is it "Bern"-"stine"? The former is the one you usually hear. The latter is the one he supposedly used himself.

Or perhaps, it's the original European pronunciation, "Behrn"-"shteyn"?

And you know what? We're fine with the confusion. Keeps the goyim on their toes.

And no, this profile is not autobiographical. Not at all.