It starts with an email in our suggestion box. "Please profile Jennifer Lawrence," it says. We think about it for a minute and pass. We just don't know what to say. Yes, she is rather attractive. Yes, she is a wonderful actress. But no, she is not even remotely Jewish. There is no hook here.
Another email comes; another request for Jennifer Lawrence. Maybe we missed something, we ask ourselves. So we do a cursory search. Well, her mother's maiden name is Koch. That could be something, couldn't it?
The suggestion box gets filled again. Again, it's Jennifer Lawrence. We look some more. No, these Koches aren't Jewish. They are Kentuckians, after all. Sorry, suggesters.
More emails... More suggestions. They come feverishly now, around the clock: Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Lawrence! She wins the Oscar, she falls down, she laughs it off... Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Lawrence, Jennifer Lawrence!
Fine! Fine, fine, fine, fine, fine! You win, suggestion box. We give up.
She is rather attractive.
She is a wonderful actress.
She is not Jewish.
She is Jennifer Lawrence.