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    Bernard Bernoulli

    Jew Score:




    Multiple endings might be commonplace in video games now, but that is what made "Maniac Mansion" so revolutionary. Published by Lucasfilm Games in 1987, not only did it give players an option of characters with distinct abilities, it also presented multiple ways to win. You could microwave a hamster! Alright, not all parts were revolutionary.

    The plot had a mad scientist, Dr. Fred, kidnap cheerleader Sandy (let's get started: Not a Jew). Her boyfriend Dave had to enlist the help of his friends to rescue Sandy from... Maniac Mansion! Did we mention there were sentient tentacles? Mummies? Mind-controlling meteors? Hamsters? (Right, we mentioned the hamster.)

    You got to pick three characters to play as. Let's just skip through all the goyim: Dave, who had no special abilities, musicians Syd and Razor, surfer dude Jeff, aspiring writer Wendy (maybe?), photographer Michael, and arrive at, yes, of course, Bernard. Just look at that pocket protector. NEEEEEEEEEERD! He was the best character in the game.

    A few years later, an equally great sequel was produced, "The Day of the Tentacle", but Bernard was the only playable character who returned. He was also given a last name: Bernoulli, an obvious(?) homage to 18th century mathematician Daniel Bernoulli.

    Bernoulli might sound Italian (it's actually Swiss), but this definitely leaves us in a conundrum. Well, one obvious answer: goyishe father, Jewish mother.

    Did you expect a different ending?

    Verdict: Jew.

    February 9, 2024

    See Also

    B. J. Blazkowicz

    Leisure Suit Larry

    Little Mac

    Steve Meretzky

    Lewis Skolnick
    © Jew or Not Jew, 2006-2024.