Who is the highest-paid Jew in Hollywood? (Yes, we realize the answer is staring right at you, but please act surprised when we get to it.)

Is it Steven Spielberg? He is one of the most powerful directors. Everything he makes turns into box office gold. (Even "A.I." G-d did "A.I." suck.)

Is it Jerry Bruckheimer? He's had incredible success producing both movies and television shows.

Is it Ben Stiller? He has his toe in everything, and has been omnipresent on the movie screen for more than a decade.

Is it Garry Shandling? OK, it's not Garry Shandling. We still love you, Garry.

It's (act surprised NOW!) Michael Bay! That's right, Michael Bay, who directs popcorn trash, made $120 million last year. (For those keeping score, Bay is adopted, but bar mitzvahed. Spielberg and Bruckheimer were both at $100 mil. Stiller at $53 mil. Shandling? Don't ask.)

Really? $120 million for a predictable plot where you knew the ending the minute it started? Well, you did just read this profile the whole way through, didn't you?